Sunday, January 15, 2012

Survivor's guilt - Merchandising edition

Had my 3-month check up this week - All Clear!! Woo hoo!!!!!

I've been lucky enough to go shopping lately, something I haven't been able to do in a while. And by shopping I mean, shopping for ME! Clothes for ME! As you Moms out there know, that's something that doesn't happen to often.

Yesterday I'm at one of my favorite haunts, Old Navy, and come across a shirt on the sale rack. It says:

Then has a little Komen for the Cure ribbon on the bottom. And its not pink. So I throw it on the pile because of course, it's for BREAST CANCER!! Like, how can I NOT have this???

As I'm in the fitting room looking at the shirt I start to have mixed feelings -
I SHOULD buy the shirt, its for a good cause.
I DON'T want the shirt, cause it's not a great design (pretty boring!).
I SHOULD buy the shirt because of what I went through.
I DON'T want the shirt because of what I went through, and I have about 5 others that make the point for me already.

I put the shirt on the NOT buying pile. And the guilt goes on the Marjie pile. Ugh.

I want to do everything I can to support the cause, and support others, without being a walking billboard. Maybe the best way to fight this disease is to show it how we go back to being normal. We show others in the fight that normal will come back. Their hair will grow again. The laughter will return. And someday, in the not too distant future, they will go a full day without remembering that they had cancer.

Of course I'm still waiting for that day, but it's coming. I know it.